The Thamesmead Grump

THE WIND OF CHANGE

Farting contest controversy.

I know this is a bit of an old story by now but I've been busy with other things and have only just got round to commenting on it.

There was controversy at last week's Grand Slam Farting Competition when both players accused each other of cheating. Dutch player Wesley Harms accused his opponent Gary Anderson of trying to distract him by throwing some darts each time he farted. Gary Anderson however was quick to respond to the accusation by claiming it was the Dutchman who was tossing darts at the board every time he tried to let rip with a particularly knockout parp.

"I know it was him" claimed Harms. "I could see his arms waving about every time I stepped up for a big one. He claims that it was just to get his fart smells properly spread over the oche, but I saw the darts in his hand; he can't deny it".

Anderson won the match 10-2.

This isn't the first time that important competitions have been sabotaged by contestants throwing darts. Who can forget the 1980s beer drinking competition, ruined by gamesmanship.

Every time you say "I don't believe in vaccines" a Reptilian Overlord dies.

Getty Images

A World Health Organisation report shows a world-wide resurgence of Measles with 30% more cases in 2017 than 2016 resulting in 110,000 deaths. 

The causes are various, from the collapsing health systems in emerging nations to the promotion of anti-vax scaremongering by the "alternative" health industry.

Sad, that a disease that should have gone the way of Smallpox years ago should still be killing children on an industrial scale because of  profiteering by crackpots and charlatans.